Life After Death?

Would you consider yourself a religious person? Quite simply- what do you believe happens when you die? Have you always believed this? Do your current beliefs align with what you were taught as a child? And if not, what was the turning point? This week, talk about your religion or spiritual beliefs (or perhaps your lack of), and try to sum up, if you can, what you believe happens "next."

~Sometimes Sweet Blog (find out what she has to say about life after death)

I believe, without a doubt, that there is life after death.  I can't imagine going through life day after day with uncertainty about what would happen when I die. I think I would be an anxious wreck. Death is a guarantee in life, and there is no way around it. I think it's foolish for people to not question or ponder life and death at some point in their life because death has major impact on our lives. Life is fleeting and uncertain. I could die today. Despite human's mortality, we are not like a tree or a bug. There's more to us. Science alone cannot explain the human race. We are too complex for science. Science can explain the life of a flower, but there is no way that atoms and "natural" happenings and LOTS of time created billions of diverse, brilliant, and creative humans. No possible chance. There had to be a mastermind out there orchestrating it all. Because I can't depend on Science for the answers to life's deeper questions-- specifically human life-- I have to turn to something more than the study of biology. 
Those who know me, know that I am a Christian. I have a feeling that most of my readers are also Christians and probably believe the same thing that I do about life and death. If you aren't a Christian or are unfamiliar with Christian beliefs and the gospel, these verses summarize the gospel and attaining eternal life well:
 "9This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. 10 This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. 11 Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. 12 No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us." 1 John 4:9-12

Jesus died for us. We believe. We follow. We live eternally with Him. 

I believe those who have the covering of Jesus in their hearts will live eternally in Heaven with God. This means they have accepted Jesus' forgiveness for their sins. We cannot possibly do enough good things to be welcomed into Heaven-- good works will not get us to Heaven. No one on earth could possibly measure up to God's standard of perfection. Jesus was perfect and he came to be the perfect sacrifice for us so that when we accept that he died and forgave us, we can be confident that we belong to God and will live with him forever when we die. Check out Hebrews 10! Because of this, death does not scare me. I can actually be excited for the day that I die because I will live with my Creator and be completely redeemed and made new. 

Read more:
This article, written by John Piper, explains why Christians should look forward to death:  It is a great gain to die: five reasons why. It's filled with scripture. 

I would love to hear what you have to say. Throw out questions or tell me a bit about your beliefs about death. If you don't have beliefs, you should! 

Scenes from the Weekend {Retreat}

This weekend I had the opportunity to leave the city for a spiritual retreat in a quaint town in Connecticut. I joined a mentor and 3 other girls that I meet with on a regular basis to reflect on the path God has each of us on. We were led by a life coach through sessions and discussions. It was a joy to talk through our past, present, and future together. 

We had a snowflake theme for the weekend. The food was delicious.

The Ocean. The ocean! Those Tims go everywhere. :)

Love these ladies!

The Other Wes Moore

I love reading nonfiction and memoirs. I picked up this book from my classroom library in the Bronx. I started reading a few pages and I was drawn in right away.

What is the Other Wes Moore about?

The other Wes Moore is an account of two men with the exact same name who grew up in the same city and faced difficult childhoods. They grew up in Baltimore in single-parent households and lacked resources. Each Wes made key choices in their life that impacted who they became in extreme ways. Wes, the author, became a Rhodes scholar, a war veteran, a white house fellow, and a business leader in New York City (I enjoyed his references to NYC and the Bronx). He is married and is raising a family. The other Wes took a small step forward when he joined job corps, but life was still hard for him. He had four kids with different baby mamas and money was tight. He had a habit of selling drugs, which was very dangerous. His story quickly takes a turn for the worst when he commits a terrible murder with his brother. I was on the edge of my seat while reading how the murder panned out. I won't give the details of the murder away here (you should read it), but it was intense and really foolish. The other Wes is now serving life in prison without parole. 

Connections
I resonated with this book because I see young people like Wes all the time in the Bronx, and I wonder who these students will become when they grew up. How can students living in the Bronx or other cities of extreme poverty overcome their circumstances and flourish? What is needed to prevent students from falling into a cycle of violence and drugs?

Where does success come from?
Wes, the author, admits that his life could have easily been the same as the other Wes'. At the same time, the other Wes could have led a successful life. Their circumstances were similar and they came from similar backgrounds. Wes' explanation for his success (and what he believes will bring others success) is summed up in one word: people. 
He says, "What changed was that I found myself surrounded by people-- starting with my mom, grandparents, uncles, and aunts, and leading to a string of wonderful role models and mentors- who kept pushing me to see more than what was directly in front of me, to see the boundless possibilities of the wider world and the unexplored possibilities within myself." 

I too credit all my successes to people that God has put in my life. Parents, mentors, friends, teachers, pastors, and family are the reason I am standing strong today. Those are the people who inspire me and help me push on. The students of Hunts Point (in the Bronx) need people to stand by them and encourage them. I hope to stand by some of my students so they will remember that someone is there to be an advocate and support them in life, especially in school.

My Story

You can find out a lot about me just by reading this blog or checking out my "about me" page. My faith is a significant part of my life and it's something that I have a hard time putting into words. I believe Christianity should be played out in life and that people shouldn't only know that I am a Christian because I say so. But testimonies are cool, and everyone has a different story for how they got to where they are. I wanted to share my brief testimony with you so you have a better idea of who I am and why I call myself a Christian.

photo taken at the Urban Refuge

I have had a relationship with God since I was little. My parents have faithfully followed Christ for many years, and their hearts for God led me to pursue a relationship with Christ. Over the last years I have matured in my faith, and I have been able to grasp and apply scripture to shape a Biblical worldview that I can stand on. God is teaching me to have more than a Sunday-school faith: He desires a relationship with me that will remain solid for a lifetime.

As a freshman in high school I made the decision to be baptized. I did this because I wanted to let those close to me know that Jesus is king of my life and that I was committed to Him. Baptism was my of sealing the deal about who I was going to follow. I knew that having the Lord in my life was the only way I would live a meaningful and holy life. 

 "And Peter said to them, Repent and be baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your sins, and you will receive the gift of the Holy Spirit." Acts 2:38

God is showing me that a  relationship means taking the time to meditate on and obey His Word: His way of communicating with me. The book of James tells me to “be a doer of the word and not a hearer only.” I am convicted to show others Jesus, to trust God in everything, and to serve because of Jesus’ love. My faith in God continues to grow as I learn more about Him, and my relationship with God will never end. I hit many bumps along the way- we all do- but I know God is sovereign in everything and my mistakes only make me remember my need for Him.

Journal it.

The following post was sparked after I read Journaling: Why bother?

I have been going through a rough patch in my life lately (okay, the past week and a half). I have picked up journaling again and it's been a calming and helpful practice for me to get back into. I process nearly everything internally before letting it out verbally, and writing it down is the best way to process those complicated things that shouldn't stay floating around in my head.

Journaling is another way for me to communicate meaningful and coherent prayers to God. I know that praying verbally is also important and effective, but sometimes I just need to let it all out on paper.

The candle is very necessary :)

When I'm not consistently journaling, my normal routine includes writing a few sentences EVERYDAY in my 1-sentence journal that will last 5 years. I have been writing in this journal for over 2 years now. It's fun to have it because I can read what I did on any given day.

Here's a random example that I flipped to:
February 1, 2013: "I failed a calculus quiz. Slightly overwhelmed by the research paper. I'm going to have hardly any time this weekend to get things done. Excited for NYC! Tonight was a good Friday."
(the next lines are for February 1, 2014 and so on....)

Okay, so it's pretty simple. Sometimes I use a little more detail, but sometimes I'm just really tired and I write without thinking in order to have SOMETHING written. Yet when I read those words, they can take me back to what I did that day, and I like that. Even if it's a little.
Note: I was referring to NYC because I was going out for the weekend to look at a college. I was not referring to City Year.

Here's to Journaling! My folks gave me a Moleskine journal for Christmas, so I'm going to enjoy filling it up for the next few months!

The said 1 sentence journal and Moleskine.

What about you? Do you spend time journaling? Do you journal to vent, reflect, pray, dream?

Making it.

I had a breakdown today. I had to leave the school for a little bit and just walk. and cry. I want to blame lack of sleep for my emotional instability, but it could also be the fact that school feels so hopeless sometimes. I haven't hit a wall, but I have to take this work one day at a time because each day is pretty taxing. I love working hard, but sometimes I feel like there is a lack of purpose to the things we do. My students are also pretty unstable when it comes to emotions and behavior. One moment they want to tell me everything they did over the weekend and complete their entire math worksheet; the next moment they're being so defiant they won't even sit down, let alone work.

I guess I just needed to let those quick feelings out. I know I didn't share many details, but I already feel more at rest. 

This verse encouraged me today- "Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men,  knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ." Colossians 3:24

This blog post also picked me up a bit.

Goodnight, 9 days until Christmas. 5 days 'til Minneapolis. 

How am I doing?

I can confidently say that I thrive in the city. The non-stop pace of it keeps me going. I enjoy working all day and then doing something fun in the evening and sometimes into the night. The new faces and places on every corner constantly catch my eye. New York is full of culture.  9 times out of 10 it seems that the people I meet aren't even New Yorkers. They are like me. Exploring a new city, and loving it . They are here for work, school, or some other crazy endeavor. The opportunities are endless. I have met a girl who attends Juliard to play the harp, I have met many girls in the thick of the fashion industry (one of my good friends from city year is taking a year off from FIT (fashion institute). I have met scholars from the ivys and the top schools in NYC. The list goes on...

I have seen people literally sleep on the streets. On the other hand, I have seen people so rich it makes my head spin (forgive the cliche). 

I know people say that New York can be a very lonely place...despite all the people. I haven't felt the loneliness at all due to a tight-knit work atmosphere and a good faith community.  

Life here is an adventure, and the school I am working in is a whirlwind.

I am blessed. I am grateful. 

Drum roll, please....

What am I doing Next Year?

For those who didn't see my previous post or do not know, I will be taking a gap year! See here. I will be taking my gap year with City Year, a program through AmeriCorps in New York City! Find out more about what I will do by clicking here!

Here are some highlights of what I'll do in the program:

-Provide Academic Support through one-on-one and group tutoring.
-Make attendance and positive phone calls home and lead mentor groups
-Organize and lead activities, celebrations and projects to improve the community and school  environment
-Team Based Service
-After School Program

Secondly, I will (Lord willing) help a church plant in Brooklyn, NY.  I don't know exactly what my role will be with it, but I'm really excited about the church plant this is happening because it is different than the traditional church, and I believe that church has to be different than it is now, because most of my generation are non church-goers. When it comes down to it, it's not about going to church; it's about a relationship with Jesus, and the church model Mike and Nicole are implementing will help foster that. Even if I'm only with their church for a year, I will learn and take away things from it.

Why am I supposed to go to New York City? How do I know?

• Future goals- I want to be a teacher or work in the education system when I grow up. Doing City Year in NYC will be a great training ground for that. I consistently tutored a 5th grade student this last semester, and really enjoyed it. I know that I will get great experience working in under-performing NY schools full-time.
• Take Risks! At my graduation ceremony, our principal boldly told us to not live a safe life. If I stayed here for my gap year, I believe that I would be doing the safe and easy thing. Yes, it would still be beneficial, but I know that doing MN math corps will not stretch me like City Year will.
• I am young. I feel like it makes the most sense to do adventures like this when I am young, because I don’t have a family, any debt, or a house.
• Other signs- One week I felt that God was giving me little signs that NY is the thing for me. In school we had a Creative Expressions Night and we were required to decorate a room based on a theme. Each room is given a different theme, and the room I was placed in happened to be New York City! sweet. I spent that week looking for all things New York. I even made a fun, little NY skyline. Secondly, the whole idea of a gap year still scared me at the time; I needed affirmation that taking a gap year was the right thing. That week, one of the founders of Hope Academy spoke with all the seniors and said that he encouraged his kids to take a gap year. He believed taking a gap year to explore your interests is a wise and beneficial thing to do. I was glad to hear that!
• It won’t be easy! Challenges are what make me grow! Here are some of the challenges-

~It will force me to manage a tight budget

~To ask for help from others

~To live simply

~To follow an INTENSE schedule. I will be at school from 7:30 am to 6:30 pm, plus commute time.

~I will probably feel lonely

~I will be away from my family and people I know

~New York is intimidating. No more “Minnesota nice.”

~I will be around many people who are different than me.

• In February, God gave me a trip to visit the king's college in Manhattan. It was super exciting to see NYC for the first time. While I didn't feel like the college was for me, I loved the city! I kept in NYC in the back of my mind. I believe that God allowed me to visit so I would become excited about this city.
• Church Plant- Shortly after this trip in February, I learned that a couple was moving to Brooklyn, NYC to plant a church there. I thought that was the coolest thing! Nicole was the outreach coordinator at Tapestry, and she and her husband planted Hiawatha church. I wanted to support them in some capacity. More churches need to be planted! New York is a lost city. Find out more about this family by reading their blog.
  

  
• My personal excitement- New York is just an exciting place. My heart feels happy when I think about it. I'm generally a practical person, and it's strange that I have continued to be excited for NY for the last few months, because NYC is not a practical place to live.

• Answered Prayer- Here’s a story: The other night I had dinner with Mike and Nicole, the couple planting a church in Brooklyn. It was a nice time. At the end of it, we prayed that God would not let me be accepted into this program if it wasn’t God's will. We prayed this because City Year is fairly selective. They accept 20% of applicants, and most of them are college graduates, only a small percentage are high school graduates. The application process was also fairly difficult. I had to write essays, submit a resume, have letters of recommendation, and then do 2 phone interviews. I was supposed to hear whether I was accepted or not on June 7th, but I was notified the NEXT day. Whoa! That had to be God saying, "go!"

• Faith- This experience will grow my faith. I’m sure of it. How could it not? Moving forward I need to have faith that God will allow me to get out there safely, that he will hopefully place me in Brooklyn so I can be a part of the church plant, that he will give me people to be with, that he will give me the strength to DO city year for 10 months. There's a lot more that I need to depend on God for, but those are some of the main things.

I am SO excited! I can't believe this is happening!!!

What about money?

Will I be able to afford NYC? Yes! I will receive a living stipend and a college scholarship at

the end of the program to help pay for college. Living will be tight, but I’ll be able to do it!

Will I come back?

My plan is to come back after the year. I deferred my admission to the University of Minnesota, and I assume that after the year I will be ready to pursue my college degree.

When will I leave?

I will leave the week of August 5th to 9th. How I'll get there is TBD.

How do my parents feel?

...I am still 17 after all. They were both slightly shocked. At first, my mom was pretty against it, I think my dad was too. However, we have good talks about it, and at our final discussion, they both came to an agreement, and by the sound of their voice, I felt like they were excited for me too.

Please feel free to contact me if you have further questions. I will write more on my blog this Summer, and I will definitely blog and post pictures of life in NYC this coming school year!

Fotos

These are some of my favorite pictures from the Dominican Republic.

Colonial Plaza

My host mom and Alandra

At the Batey

Mangu (mashed plantains)

So beautiful!

Teaching at a Haitian School

Playing with kids

The team + some extras